think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
