i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Randomize
