WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
either way he was missing a nipple.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
