Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
