Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
