dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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