i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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