What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
