Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize