I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
