Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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