please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I just found puke in my bra..
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
