my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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