No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
