just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
