you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
