Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
