apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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