no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
