Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
