dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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