People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
