Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
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oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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