u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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