The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
