She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
