new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I think I just sharted jello shots
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize