did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
