He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
