id be glad to
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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