if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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