awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
