I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Randomize
