I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
