she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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