he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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