Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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