is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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