the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
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