You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
