real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
