Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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