the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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