Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Randomize
