What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Randomize
