So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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