these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
this just has baby written all over it
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
