he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
