i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize