pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
