She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
