Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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