Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Just cropdusted the office
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
